From the Mailbag: Not Single?

Q. I've heard that you're not single anymore and that you have a girlfriend. What was the dating scene like?

A. The thing that no one emphasizes about dating is that it's largely spending time with strangers, and I have never been good with strangers. It takes me a while to get to feel comfortable with people. I kept imagining first dates filled with sparkling and witty conversation, and maybe that happens for people if they are really lucky. And if they are lucky enough to go out with someone more instantly charming than I.

As for my girlfriend -- and I have to say, I love saying I have a girlfriend -- she and I kind of stumbled into a relationship. For a while, I thought I definitely did NOT want to end up in a relationship that way. I wanted to meet someone out of the blue and be absolutely dazzled and all that jazz. But now I see that the old saw about the journey and not the destination does not apply here. With love, it's where you end up, not how you get there.